absurd considering they have the NFL’s No. 1 scoring defense.

Yet skepticism centers on the Pats going all season without playing against a quarterback whose passer rating was in the NFL’s top 10.

(Perhaps most troubling for New England is that Bears bust Shea McClellin is one of their starting middle linebackers.)

There’s a fit: The Patriots have a young quarterback the Bears need, and the Bears have defenders who would fortify the Patriots’ front seven.

The Bears aren’t the NFL’s foremost imagineers, so New England commander-in-chief Bill Belichick would have to subtly manipulate the terms of a trade.

Bears: “Bill, what are you asking for Garoppolo?”

Belichick: “For starters, your third overall pick in the draft.”

Bears: “We can’t do that.”

Belichick: “What are you offering?”

Bears: “Duh, we don’t know.”

Belichick: “Maybe we’d settle for a couple of players off your defense.”

Bears: “Sure, OK.”

The Bears would think they’re outsmarting the Patriots by not surrendering the No. 3 overall pick.

Belichick has had success coaching veterans from other teams, plus he knows Bears personnel after the Pats scrimmaged against them during training camp last summer.

The Bears could tell Belichick he can have any two players from their defense except outside linebacker Leonard Floyd.

When Belichick insists he has to have Floyd and another player — perhaps one of the Bears’ inside linebackers to replace McClellin — the response should be “Bingo!”

Two defensive starters comprise a high price for low certainty in the green Garoppolo, but quarterbacks always are overpriced.

Then the Bears could use the No. 3 overall draft pick on a playmaker to help replace the defenders they lost.

Meanwhile, New England would acquire front seven players for a backup quarterback who wasn’t going to play for them anyway.

The Bears and Patriots can thank me now or thank me later for negotiating this deal.

mimrem@dailyherald.com